Angry Scissors

©Stacie Sandall

Three pairs of angry scissors smirk,

dripping with sweat.

Warm, wet pencils stand and salute

the fallen piece of paper they once called friend.

Ramblings 2

©Stacie Sandall

Bread grunts

as peanut butter sits on him,

laughing,

pinching his cheeks,

and giving him an Indian burn.

Dust

©Stacie Sandall

Screaming, naked dust

darted down the hallway soaking wet.

A raving mob of drenched rags swiped angrily.

Dust lunged under the rug

and giggled.

The mob grunted

and stomped away in retreat.

Flight

©Stacie Sandall

Dragons danced up in my head,

like blades of grass in my flower bed.

They changed directions in the breeze

and soared above my mental trees.

They sang to me of castles vast,

of villages and peasants past.

They whispered words of a soothing spell,

and spoke their tales of knights, as well.

As the sun descended from above my eyes,

the dragons and I said our last good-byes.

Off in the air, they flew back home,

and left me unafraid to roam.

Nine Hours in Front of a Computer Screen

©Stacie Sandall

The blue mouse pad looks like an animal was chewing on it.

Some guy I didn't know I knew

is talking of things I forgot I did.

My hat is squeezing the top of my head into a point.

A girl resembling a blimp is floating from her keyboard.

Now the room is empty, except for all the stuff.

The whir of the farthest ceiling fan

is drowning out the nearest.

The sugar from a warm soda is running through my veins.

I have to go pee.

Fly Away

©Stacie Sandall

I like to watch them play,

dancing,

twirling,

screaming in the cold, unforgiving wind.

They toss and turn.

Up they go without a sound to the tops of the trees.

For a brief moment,

I swear they sprouted eyes.

I think they are laughing inside.

Then they fly away.

Listen

©Stacie Sandall

Listen to the shadow,

the little broken-winged blackbird

chirping,

laying in the wet dandelions,

soft and delicious.

Meow.

Sky Is Falling

©Stacie Sandall

The amber sunset twists down the sky

while they lay motionless beneath the clouds,

their finely sculpted bodies

woven like unattended vines.

With eyes of laughter and mouths of pain,

they wait for the sky to fall.

Silver shadows climb damp branches

as darkness thickens.

Surging clouds shake the night.

The waning moon trembles above,

reflecting nature's motives.

Stones beneath aching backs

fight against the burden,

while blades of grass wave above

to the night air song.

Cold earth dances atop their faces like sleet

as their sky rains down.

Shed the Light

©Stacie Sandall

Unleashed memories

blacken moving sky.

Ash lay crisp

against the moon.

Remaining light

melting time,

shedding light,

sloughing skywards.

Eminent

©Stacie Sandall

I walk in the wind; there is no air.

I feel their presence; there is no one there.

I do what they tell me; no sound to be heard.

Body so young, mind yet matured.

I speak my peace; I make no sound.

I cannot be lost; I cannot be found.

They take me on journeys; I stay on one land.

I write these words; they control my hand.

Undiscovered

©Stacie Sandall

near the ice-bundled river

where my lifeless body lays

I am forgotten

skin hardened

lips fractured

trees crack under weighty snow

foraging fauna wander aimlessly

unaware of my empty eyes

gazing awkwardly into the colorless sky

the dogs have come and gone

the sun has risen and set uncounted times

skin slips soft

trees crack with spring thaw

near the rushing river

where my lifeless body lays

I am forgotten

Run, Little One

©Stacie Sandall

Run, little one, to find your place

before the wrath of time can scar your face.

Run, little one. The light is gone.

Too late to repent, the line is drawn.

Run, little one. Run for the rain.

Run to your god who erases the stain.

Run, little one. The time is near

to praise your god, for he is here.

Speak confections with a mouth full of dirt.

It will crumble beneath you and devour the hurt.

Run, little one. Run and scream.

You'll wish it was only just a dream.

Run, little one. Kick and claw.

Feel me tear. Feel me gnaw.

Madness comes and madness goes.

When it stops, no one knows.

Your only safety is six underground.

Ashes, ashes -- you will fall down.

Barren Hell

©Stacie Sandall

Frozen stiff,

except for our eyes,

we peer from our hoods

like owls in the night.

As our mittens stiffen,

mouths frozen shut,

snow falls to cover our feet,

too heavy to move.

We stand like statues of cold stone.

Snow-covered branches fall to the earth.

Our fingers turn blue

as we try to clutch anything.

We open our eyes, now dry.

Hoping for summer,

our hair turns brittle.

The whipping wind beats our cheeks

like branches of icy steel.

Our teeth bear this wasteland,

this colorless, barren hell.

Feeling the pain,

our toenails crack beneath rubber boots.

We try to speak with ice forming on our tongues,

tissue on our lips tearing as we try.

The stinging of our flesh rises from our toes.

Trembling sounds of winter

and the sounds of our own breath,

snapping in mid-exhale,

screeching in our minds.

We sleep often -- it passes time.

We stand still, brooding in the pain,

in our own waste frozen to our clothes.

Our eyelashes fall to the white powder.

Our heads slightly bowed, we try to look up.

Our covered necks stiff despite our efforts,

weighted down by a blanket of death.

We still wait for salvation.

With no shelter, we wait.

Grow, My Children

©Stacie Sandall

I have spent pages trying to free them

so they could survive without me.

I have sent them soaring from my heart like paper gulls.

These words bluntly retreat and cling to the pages.

Dependent on my every tormenting thought,

they need me as I once needed them.

They are my children, my teachers.

I try hard to forget why I started,

but I will always remember why I ended.

One Perfect Day

©Stacie Sandall

All I need is just one perfect day.

One day to live for myself,

not how others want me to live.

I want to smash the barrier of time,

shelter the fleeing moment,

seize the child in the one who cries

and find the weakness in hate.

All I need is just one perfect day.

One day to do what I want to do,

not what others think I should do.

I want to touch the highest mountain,

dig the darkest hole,

find the hidden valley

and swim in the lurking fathoms.

All I need is one perfect day.

One day to be what I want to be,

not what others expect me to be.

I need to glide above the sun,

float among the tides

and wail among the beasts.

All I need is just one perfect day.

One day to be loved.

One day to be free.

Laughing Boughs

©Stacie Sandall

Swaying branches in the wind,

lower your boughs and let me in.

Oh, lovely limbs, whisper softly to me.

Laugh in my wake and sing in my sleep.

Laughing boughs, share my pain.

Shelter me close from the rain.

Weep with me in times of woe,

and within my tears you, too, shall grow.

Loving arms, embrace my breath.

Hold it tight and protect me from death.

Laughing boughs in the breeze,

taste my sorrow, oh mighty trees.

Boundaries

©Stacie Sandall

Don't reach to the edge of forever,

where their bodies throb in the darkness.

They hover above me in hot fervor,

slapping with proud tongues.

They prey on dreams and destroy the evidence.

Screaming, I clutch wet blankets.

Not even an echo bounces among the stars.

The silence jolts me from my sleep.

My sweaty brow gleams and the shadow of dreams slips away.

Taunted

©Stacie Sandall

I hear them in the dark,

their skull-piercing shriek.

Grasping in the deep,

my knees becoming weak.

The pawing hands, 

the tugging fingers,

the more I fight

the more it lingers.

I feel my pale skin tearing,

sweat streaming down my back,

lashing at every wound

and rotting flesh to black.

Forehead against terra

knotted nakedness

eyes softening

knuckles broken

thighs hardening

dust

Why?

©Stacie Sandall

Why, Lord?

Why won't you kill me?

The pain I endure,

is it funny to watch?

Why, Lord?

Why do you hate?

Is loving me more than

you're willing to do?

Why, Lord?

Why do I suffer?

Why does my torment

please you so?

Why, Lord?

Why must I stay?

I've offered life more

than I'm willing to give.

Why, Lord?

Why must I live?

Why would you want

me to suffer this way?

Enough is enough.

The pain will not stop.

I want nothing to do

with this life anymore.

I want no more sorrow.

I want no more sting.

Remove me from this dust,

or steady my eager hand.

Letting Go

©Stacie Sandall

Holding on to what I need the most,

carrying the love you once deprived me

and kept me hollow.

Holding on,

sucking on your sympathy,

choking on your apathy

I was forced to swallow.

Treading away,

falling away,

letting me fade,

crawling away.

Floating away,

falling from grace,

letting me fall,

fading away.

Letting go of things that I fear the most,

carrying the stones that once pinned me

without resistance.

Letting go,

feeling me pull away,

watching me fade away

into the distance.

Find Me

©Stacie Sandall

Find me

lost inside myself,

lost inside a world that doesn't believe I exist.

I stand before you

cloaked by what you want to see,

chained by your judgment.

Find me.

Find me

in the shell of your own design,

the shell you've lost

in the chasm of your ignorance.

My screams tighten the binds

and stoke the fire beneath me.

Find me.

Find me

whipping the beast within,

groveling beneath my skin.

I crawl on skinned knees

for your forgiveness.

Save me from shame.

Find me.

Castaway

©Stacie Sandall

Feeling out of place,

trying to find her way,

she was better off

when she was made of clay.

Creeping like a mantis,

with nowhere else to be,

to choose between earth and air,

she chooses to be free.

One in a herd,

one in ten,

or a black sheep roaming

with its shadow again.

Back Off

©Stacie Sandall

To the thick mosaic of words massaging the wall,

to the film of chalk dust on the ends of my fingers,

to the insulated thoughts swirling around in my head,

to the smeared slate penetrating sweat beads on my temples,

to the questioning looks from the tight-ass in the corner...

I put my fingers to the black.

I pull down,

searing decibels,

rattling windows,

and a big "Thank you for nothing."

Glass House

©Stacie Sandall

seek and stone

forget your home

forget your sins

you're on your own

cast the rock

eye on the clock

toss and run

back to your flock

you're up next go-round

left to drown

when your glass house cracks

and crumbles down

Karma

©Stacie Sandall

It must be karma.

We ants running around

like headless chickens,

looking for the nearest buck to pass or spend,

wondering why we aren't happy.

The hoarding masses of has-beens, will-bes,

and everything in between

take more time to look at themselves in the mirror

than to consider the consequences

of a frown or a raised finger.

Forgiveness

©Stacie Sandall

As the orange moon peeked its round head over the horizon,

he let an angry tear roll down his leathery face.

He would never again caress her round, brown cheeks,

or dance beside her under the dawn of the 3 a.m. sky.

His heavy head swam in puddles of guilt.

The bright orange sphere reared its bulging head

to sneer in protest over the swelling horizon.

He would miss the way sunsets made him feel one with her.

As he walked down the barren path

towards the flaming yellow ball one last time,

he remembered her last words: "I forgive you."

Wooden

©Stacie Sandall

He sits with his head bowed.

His rough, callous hands fondle each other

while curious people pass by and stare.

The wooden, yellow park bench

dips under his weight and creaks in disagreement.

His hair flips gently in the breeze.

He lifts his sore, bleached body to its feet

and runs his skinny fingers through his greasy hair.

The wooden park bench creaks again in relief.

Waiting Asters

©Stacie Sandall

Her asters bloom

in the red squares of the clay earth.

She gapes at their gaunt petals,

hoping to gain sympathy

from the slightest sway in their wilting stems.

Her core's blackened surface

a fragile mask, a crusted shell.

Trees cringe with fear

and weep beneath the paling sky.

Unaware of the burning asters at her naked feet,

without a hand to yank her from this infected womb,

within these inherited boundaries,

she is forced to wait.

Moving On

©Stacie Sandall

Since we have to say good-bye,

before we leave we have to try

not to weep, not to cry,

for times that linger or times that fly.

The time has come to realize

that now is where our future lies.

As time disappears before our eyes,

we move on to greater skies.

We'll spread our wings and fly away,

but we'll be back another day.

As you lead us to the gate we'll say,

"Thanks for showing us the way."

Nightmare

©Stacie Sandall

sun fading

twilight glistening

river screaming

banks swelling

bridge trembling

blacktop sighing

thoughts collapsing

sleep retreating

sheets soaking wet

Senses

©Stacie Sandall

Seeing moon

watches me.

Tingling rain

touches me.

Laughing sun

breaks me.

Nothing safe.

Antelope Dust

©Stacie Sandall

Melted glass streaks down like tears

as dented lilies weep.

Frayed wicks line the pages,

collecting antelope dust.

Scorched

©Stacie Sandall

parched weeds

charred

prickly

melted

panicking

watching rings of warmth

billow in unison

from the yellowed earth

Forgetting

©Stacie Sandall

Tears run like rivers.

Twisted boughs fall to dusty fields.

Sweaty arms tear soft pages

from my memory.

Wax to Ashes

©Stacie Sandall

I kneel in the ashes

of my miscounted blessings,

teething on the flesh

of my inner paper.

My shriveling, scraping hand

erases a blinding globe.

Wax,

secreting dirt,

surrounds itself with black bricks.

A rusted wall

gives in to the red tree of darkness.

Ramblings 1

©Stacie Sandall

stripping scarred thoughts

from beneath smothered, faded green stems,

painted, rotating water

turns brass

salt-laden cities of molded sands

fierce winds free a nation

of tiny people

soft, tingling planets

patiently float beyond the moon

touching nothing

watching everything

Withered

©Stacie Sandall

Green and creeping,

warm and weeping,

see the roots

are never sleeping.

Gently growing,

never slowing,

feel the wind

forever blowing.

Sun is setting,

vines regretting,

reaching upward,

awaiting wetting.

Hopes are torn,

withered with scorn,

wilting silent

until reborn.

Embryo

©Stacie Sandall

rushing

reddened

hardened

flying

diving

grabbing air

laughing wildly

slamming hard

into the ground

blackened

burning

distrusted

is he

Good-bye

©Stacie Sandall

With the emptiness of the room

and the smell of exotic incense,

they hover over this place.

Their advice still lingers in my ears.

With each passing,

a part of me journeys with them.

Yesterday I inhaled them as my destiny.

Tomorrow I will exhale them as a dream.

Day of Mourning

©Stacie Sandall

The soft amber horizon

flutters faintly between night and light,

furling in the annealing morning.

Jagged thoughts lose fluency,

and hot grains of mistrust survive.

The smile bestowed only a silky veneer.

Pale hands grieve

as eyes photograph epitaphs.

Each sigh paints a picture.

Ambient tongues sleep in quiet mouths.

The smell of aged flowers

steals the afternoon away.

White Fulfilled

©Stacie Sandall

Liquid suffering flows through my trembling hand.

Fine threads of consciousness dangle from my fingers.

You are my only escape, o lines of straight.

I've nowhere to go but to the quill.

Ears closed to my verbal scribbling,

I'm left scratching on soft whiteness.

Blank pages fill with sharp edges and marred thoughts.

Blank pages adhere to my senses, massaging my brittle ego.

Ink dances across the parchment,

collecting my despair as it drips.

What was once a crutch is now a necessity.

What was once a hiding place is now a home.

Within these margins I am secure,

this wretched bliss I will defend.

Unfinished Seeds

©Stacie Sandall

Unable to finish things I've begun,

discouragement a vortex

I cannot escape.

Time has tilted,

fear of failure a stone for my foot to strike.

Dreams strewn about like seeds to the field.

The aging sun bleaches my memories

as they awkwardly tumble from my notebook.

Their destiny is to be forgotten.

Erupt

©Stacie Sandall

Words inside,

contained but steady.

They won't erupt

until they're ready.

Sores tear open,

raging within.

Wounds buried deep

where they can begin.

Boiling and spreading,

carving a path,

looking for places

to lay their wrath.

Angry and deep,

starving and stirring,

ripping the seams,

the concept is blurring.

Grabbing the knife,

letting them flow,

tourniquet futile.

Let the seed grow.

Life Lessons

©Stacie Sandall

I stumble about picking up the pieces,

some fragments minute

and dissolving into my fingertips.

Embedded under my nails,

they stain for all to see,

a permanent reminder of lessons learned.

Each jagged shard,

tarnished and cracked,

is swept under an invisible rug

but are not forgotten.

Shelter

©Stacie Sandall

Forecast reads no chance of hell,

but like the sky it comes when it pleases,

catching me off-guard.

I never see the clouds form,

no thunder to warn.

Hell falls like stones,

rendering me useless.

I cower beneath the tree of Christ

and hope its leaves are enough.

I nurse my scrapes,

my hands swollen and bruised,

and step into the sunlight again

to climb the hill put before me.

Messiah on the Mountain

©Stacie Sandall

In the shadow of the fallen crucifix

he is bent, digesting wood splinters.

Massive pools of sacrifice

saturate his torn feet as he fell to his knees.

He dipped his pierced hands

into the distorted reflection

of his pasty cheeks and knotted hair.

The deep amber sand swallowed his blistered toes

and he bathed in the praise of the calm air

brushing against the cage of his naked ribs.

He held the burning ground close to his chest

as he closed his bloodshot eyes and prayed.

Rastignit

©Stacie Sandall

A feverish murmur poured over the crowd.

As the heat among the masses rose,

hands fanned puffy faces.

Grinning animals fondled stained whips,

the snapping resonating in the sweat-stained air.

Believers slid to the infertile soil wailing.

Random fingers and wicked tongues pointed viciously.

Flawless, he was mounted, clothed in disheveled remnants.

The swell of flies hummed around his thorn-clad head,

busily nibbling at gapping wounds.

A mallet lay at the foot of the beastly structure

covered by wilted leaves and dried flowers.

Hiding Place

©Stacie Sandall

evacuation of mind

safer inside

making room for me to hide

pushing it out

throwing it away

clearing some room for me to stay

evacuation of self

choosing an alter

morph myself before I falter

hide myself

bury me deep

where I can slumber, where I can creep

evacuation of soul

consciousness slips

sleeping soundly while time dips

Hindered

©Stacie Sandall

stagnant flesh

languid desire

collecting on my shoulders

rendering the journey contemptible

Denial

©Stacie Sandall

silver tongue

hot blade

sees the cuts

he gladly made

gnashing teeth

smiling wide

steaming mouth

with hate inside

denies the scorn

ignores the pain

laughs at the blood

laughs at the stain

pointed tongue

wicked breath

words that burn

with stench of death

blackened lips

charred and frayed

tastes like panic

from his charade

denies the screams

ignores the tears

laughs at the torment

laughs at my fears

I See

©Stacie Sandall

I see

pyramids of reversed spirituality,

glass houses dipped in endless maroon pools

of the remains of fragile egos.

I see

the tamed crimson sun

cringing in disgust,

bowing down

to revolve around the demanding herds

moping across country club battlegrounds.

I see

myself,

weaving in and out of literary witch-hunts,

segregated from the pods of sheep

in scratchy tweed suits,

their eyes bobbing to the beat of a smaller drum.

Fear of Sentiment

©Stacie Sandall

Crumbling leaves

enveloped the ridges of rusty vines

as he carved his initials

into the peeling skin of the agate wall.

The pale, frigid stones beneath his feet

made his toes coil,

and the screeching odor

of burnt bread filled his lungs.

His naked body trembled

as half-blind hounds sniffed at him from a distance.

Moist, black tangles

poured from his head

and pallid ribs jutted from odd places.

While knotted knees wobbled and dipped,

vacant eyes scaled every inch of the damp earth.

Grabbing a gnarled twig,

he descended to all fours

and carved his initials into the peat.

Paper Soldiers

©Stacie Sandall

Reluctantly reaching for her favorite deck

of shiny blue Bicycle poker cards,

the strain on Mom's work-ruined back pains her.

A small groan falls from her tired, pale lips.

Her back still gives her trouble these days.

As she tries to shuffle

the perfect pile of slick cards,

her swollen fingers fumble the deck.

One, two, ten cards are dealt --

Mother in the purple pajamas Father hates so much.

Our nightly ritual of gin rummy on the floor

quickly transforms from an innocent card game

into a deadly battlefield

of aces, deuces, fives and others.

She arranges her little paper soldiers in a fan

and eyes them more carefully.

A husky sigh escapes into the quiet

as she examines my face for signs of weakness.

King of hearts, two of clubs, five of spades...

She'll mutter loudly under her foul breath

of bananas and sour ice cream.

As she clumsily grasps at my first sacrifice,

another of her warriors goes down

to the line of fire to replace it.

At that sight of my snatching up her little paper friend,

a cloud of disappointment

slips across her wrinkled mouth and brow.

After my next discard,

her looks of approval drip on my fallen soldier.

Presenting her next attack move to the war of black and red,

her small hazel eyes show that her eight of spades

might somehow give her another chance

to unite the small army in front of her.

Mother mumbles about her aches

and scrunches her cold, dry toes until they crack.

She pretends to watch television and not worry

about my next deadly move.

At last, possessing all clubs in my hand,

I discard the five of hearts

and fan my triumphed army onto the carpet.

My war cry of "Gin!" stings the air.

Mother smiles obsequiously though she’s sore from losing.

She sleepily gathers the remains of her conquered militia

and lays them face-down in defeat.

She says goodnight with a tired smile

and limps the first three steps to her room,

almost falling into the plant by the door.

Her leg still gives her trouble these days.

I hear the top of her huge brown bottle

of pain killers on her dresser pop off,

and the familiar rattle of her little white saviors.

She'll soon retreat to the safety

of the warm waterbed she shares with Father.

The gentle sea of waves will gently rock her to sleep,

only to be awakened by her own snoring.

We'll probably play again tomorrow.

Tomorrow, maybe she won't be so tired.

Six

©Stacie Sandall

Rolling time around in the palm of my hand,

I look upon it with awe.

How fast it moves,

like a babbling stream,

never ceasing so I can catch my breath.

Yesterdays become minutes;

tomorrows become todays in seconds.

Your delicate pink skin now dirt-stained,

in your eyes in the wisdom you think you own

and the innocence you will keep so briefly.

Rolling time around in the palm of my hand,

I look upon the remains of your childhood

pulled from beneath your pillow

and pray I'm strong enough

to steady your path

and carry you when you cannot cross.

Moonlight Garden

©Stacie Sandall

August gardens

summer moon

outstretched paths flowering soon

loving light

laugh and play

delicious sun was yesterday

slowly fluttering

wind-blown leaves

delicious shadows, forbidden trees

winter winds

falling light

waking dreams, descending night

Interrupted

©Stacie Sandall

trembling eyelids lift

uprooting delicious dream

soft trees of sleep dissolve

Internal

©Stacie Sandall

Cotton skies rise above.

Grass whispers in my ears.

The tickle of the wind

skips across my skin.

Musky scents of rebirth

hover above my lips.

Non-committal twitters

flutter past my nose.

Fuzzy in and out,

heavy eyes submitting.

The delicate call of the earth

sends me deep.

Farewell to Misery

©Stacie Sandall

Forgotten memories touch me

like delicate veins simmering under my skin,

chewing until I bruise.

Soft, aged pages open;

thoughts flower into sickness.

This beautiful chaos ends

as I blossom.

Forsaken

©Stacie Sandall

Dead embers smolder

and smoke tumbles through new stars

like a dying waterfall smudging the balmy dusk,

the warmth a faded blanket on my heart.

Crumpled roots outline

the misplaced path below.

Iridescent threads of dew-dipped webs

grip a tipped fence.

Exposed holes reveal time-worn earth

and layers of abandonment.

Between distant trees,

hollow echoes swirl,

dancing along canyon walls.

Empty winds sing like dusty memories.

Open Grave

©Stacie Sandall

Black seeps through white,

veil parted enough to lament

no parting dialogue to dwell upon.

Ties have been tossed aside

with no regard for the tactless imagery.

Soil-stained soles trod on,

anxiety lying in wait

beneath salty palms.

Aged wooden handles beckon,

discarded to the grass.

No stairs are welcome here.

Eyes closed,

all is left behind with descension.

Eternal Glory

©Stacie Sandall

Cold emptiness,

silent and dim,

with perfume in the air

and mourners grim.

“I'm not finish,” He said

as He folded His sheet.

He looked up at the light

and rose from His seat.

A lifetime of teaching

for an interlude of pain,

He died on the cross

to remove the stain.

Crowning words

for a chosen few

were planted deep

and His kingdom grew.

Eight Feet and Waiting

©Stacie Sandall

Eight Feet and Waiting

warm bubbles rise

dissolve at reach of sky

carrying my voice

lifting my cry

wetness within

bating my breath

sinking in fathoms

gasping in death

cold creeping slowly

chest aching heavy

arms and fingers numbing

in the deepening levy

waiting for the silty bottom

to reach my naked toes

ready for the mossy dark

that lurks beneath the flows

Needing

©Stacie Sandall

You are my air.

You fill me with life.

You are my earth.

You hold me up.

You are my sun.

You warm my heart.

You are my moon.

You light my darkness.

You are my stars.

You point the way.

You are my rock.

You keep me steady.

You are my wind.

You swept me away.

You are my everything.

You are my life.

Where Have You Been?

©Stacie Sandall

Your eyes kiss me with every glance,

your touch like velvet raindrops,

your hair like baby’s breath,

your soul caressing mine with each smile.

Where have you been?

So long have I prayed.

So long have I waited.

So long have I cried.

So long have I ached for that piece of me forever lost.

Please don't let go.

One Kiss

©Stacie Sandall

The warmth inside me wells up,

wells up at your touch.

Your eyes let me fall,

fall in for a euphoric swim.

Your smile dances in my mind,

dances like a waltz in mid-melody.

The vines of your heart have captured mine,

captured and held tight.

They beat in unison to meld our souls,

meld and become as one.

A Dream Unspoken

©Stacie Sandall

As he caressed my face,

brushed my hair back,

I was oblivious to everything around me

except the taste of his lips,

the smell of his skin and warmth of his breath.

For one brief moment he was my entire world.

For one brief moment he was mine.

Near Me

©Stacie Sandall

fingers locked in mine

feet entwined in an embrace

love emanates from you

and I see it in your face

green eyes soft as angels' wings

neck musks of familiarity

breath like a sweet December wind

strong arms tight around me

your strength my earth to stand on

touch gentle like midnight air

smile bright just as the Christmas star

and love lights in your stare

my heart lies next to yours

entangled in your web

hand in hand we stand

as the winds of change may ebb

Temporary

©Stacie Sandall

tall grass whips my calves

foreign cawing fills the night air

your fingers briefly glance off mine

as we trek the untrodden plains

the African moon sheds enough

to see the shine in your eyes

as you peer through the dark

in my direction

lips meet lips

before I can speak

and are gone again

before I can taste

reality tows me back

kicking and screaming

yet again

daylight is my curse

Georgia 1922

©Stacie Sandall

The Model-T stalls

on that flat, dusty road.

You take my hand.

Your eyes comb my face,

reaching for the moment.

The same sweltering Georgia air

running through your six-o'clock shadow

ran between my breasts.

The words were slow in coming,

though our hearts pounded

through our Sunday best.

             º º º

Fingertips racing past,

flesh tingling at the danger,

breath dancing on a bare neck,

teeth grinding,

we cave.

My stomach cringes under your weight.

My toes curl at every stroke.

Kisses float beneath warm tear drops,

wrists burning on the seats.

             º º º

As the Model-T starts once more,

afternoon gives way to stars.

The road ahead

seems almost shorter,

straighter –

unlike the path

laid down for me this morning.

What was simple before breakfast

has now turned taste.

I Can't Say It

©Stacie Sandall

When I look into your eyes

I can see the tempestuous sea.

I hear the thundering waves

every time you look at me.

I have searched for a lifetime

and all I've found just wasn't real.

Now my searching is over

and I can't tell you how I feel.

Will you run if I speak?
Would you hide from my words?

Or will you smile and take my hand,

and stick around for another verse?

I can't tell you that you're my sky,

the key to every question “Why?”.

You're every breath I'll ever take,

in every choice I'll ever make.

You're the rhyme in every song,

the right to every wrong.

You're the gleam of every star,

but I can't show you all you are.

We're clouds passing in the sky,

headlights flashing in the night.

Our eyes collide from across the room,

but my heart puts up a fight.

I stammer and I fall

when you walk into the room,

but I can't divulge my deepest thoughts

of me as bride and you as groom.

Should I drop to my knees

and tell you your soul makes my heart sing?

Will you shake your head and sigh

when I unveil everything?

You're a decade too gone

With a woman by your side.

I'm left to wallow in my hate

for these feelings that I hide.

Lose My Breath

©Stacie Sandall

Every breath I take

is full of you,

the steps I take

on the morning dew,

the jaded grass

between my toes,

the wilt of lilies

'neath my nose,

the beams of sun kiss

on my lips,

the felt of sea on my fingertips,

a steady breeze

on wilted cheek,

in every single word I speak.

My eyelids flit

across your face

to delete a memory I can't erase

Air turns stale

between my teeth.

My tongue falls silent,

dried beneath.

Toss and turn

the nightly fare,

the pillow's unfettered

by your hair.

Moonlight is dulled

with nowhere to go.

Flowers fade

with no reason to grow.

Stars crumple and they fall.

Planets twist out of line.

The earth trembles at my feet.

The sun no longer comes to shine.

Every beat of my heart

screams for your touch.

The weight of your love

is almost too much.

Colorado Moon

©Stacie Sandall

The barbed wire is cold

under the Colorado moon.

I choose a dwarf fence post to lean.

Nothing is said but starlight.

The moon does amazing things

to the horizon.

Cautious footsteps

and sultry musk

approach from behind.

Nothing said but a nod.

The moon does amazing things

to the midnight air.

Wind whispers across the brush

as you choose a post nearby.

The wire no longer seems cold.

Nothing said but a smile.

The moon does amazing things

to dusty blue eyes.

At a naked interval in the wire

our fingers entangle.

Our limbs follow.

Nothing said but a kiss.

The moon does amazing things

to your taste.

Mistral

©Stacie Sandall

your fingers dancing

up and down

my eyes closed

to absorb the sound

delicate plucking

quick and light

hot notes tickling

left and right

vibrations embrace

when you begin

lyrics digging

deep within

your eyes closed

you drift away

drawn in as I

as you play

toe in movement

voice low and sweet

my heart is syncing

with the beat